I have to comb Angel pretty much every day, or that long, fluffy fur gets all tangled and knotted.  So I reach for the comb tonight and make my "c'mere" noise.  He starts toward me, then stops when Clarence beats him to me.  Okay, fine.  I put the comb down, grab Clarence's brush and begin brushing.  Angel curls up under my chair and waits patiently.  Once Clarence has had enough brushing and runs off, he gets up, yawns, and walks over for his turn.

It's all Jim Butcher's fault.  Actually, it's Priscellie's fault for announcing Jim was on Twitter.  I wasn't going to get into that darnit!  But I got all interested and ... yeah, you can find me on Twitter as WeatherWitcfh68.  Or click here, probably.

*headdesk*

Took a brain break from work to brush my kitties.  (Hey, some people take smoke breaks, I take cat-brushing breaks.  I guarantee you my blood pressure is lower than theirs.) 

Anyway, the cats decided to get into the grooming action, and it turned into another free-for-all.  Both cats licking each other and occasionally me, and me brushing whatever I could reach.  Always makes me awwwww.

I don't get why rain makes people sleepy.  I'm sitting here staring at a downpour, and it's making it ten times harder than usual to wake up.  Guh.  I wondered at first if it was some holdover from the cavepeople days.  I mean, you can't exactly go out and hunt for your food when it's coming down a gully washer, right?  Might as well sleep.  Then again, I suppose there's that pesky stitching together of animal skins for clothing that could be done.  I dunno.

I also don't get why menopause doesn't hit until a woman is in her 50's.  I mean, come on, I'm 40 fricking years old.  I'm not going to have kids so just freakin' GIVE IT UP MOTHER NATURE!  Pack it in, call it a day, it ain't happening.  Give up already.

Damn PMS.

My new phone has a better camera than my old one.  So here's some pics of my kitties!  (Though sending them from my phone did downgrade the quality a bit ... I'll have to play with that.)



There's Angel, and gotta love the glowing eye effect I wound up with from the flash teehee.  Yep it has a flash, how cool is that?



And there's Clarence, who wouldn't look at the camera.



And one of both.  They love to supervise our activities from that spot.  Heehee.

Everywhere you will hear the advice "follow your dreams."  Well enough, but sometimes a dream just doesn't happen no matter how hard you try.  Sometimes it just isn't in the cards.  What then?

Too many people sit around and bemoan the loss of their dream.  They let bitterness poison any happiness they might have had in their lives, and the blessings they have go ignored instead of embraced. 

I say, sure, go for your dream.  But if you find that it just isn't possible for you, look around for another dream.  It's not settling for something less or reaching not as far.  It's more ... looking sideways to find something you hadn't considered before.  There's nothing wrong with a shining spanking-new dream.  We humans are supposed to be adaptable, after all.  And it seems to me that those who succeed in being happy are generally the ones that are more flexible.

And while you're looking for that new dream, don't forget to observe and be thankful for the blessings in your life.

If you've never had a cat chasing the light from a laser pointer, you don't know what you're missing.  It's a blast.  Angel has totally figured out where that light is coming from, but it doesn't dampen his enjoyment one little bit.  He sees me grab for the laser pointer and gets all excited.  He'll jump halfway up a wall chasing that thing, and meow his disappointment when it vanishes.

Clarence, on the other hand, doesn't get it.  He keeps giving Angel "WTH are you chasing??" looks that are completely hilarious.

I've lost four pounds!  *jumps for joy*  Diet got blown a bit today, but that's okay.  Just a bump in the road.

I discovered someone has written a biography titled "The Gerbil Farmer's Daughter."  Oh heck yes, I'm buying it!  *dances*

So I have decided I'm sick of being fat.  Not just fat, in the obese category.  I found this awesome site to help manage my food and exercise.  This will be good for my diabetes, and probably my sleep and my depression, as well as just plain weight.  I am determined!  Still going to work on getting off the artificial sweeteners, too.

On the pets front, I have finally managed to get two female gerbils to live together peaceably, after a very long staged introduction.  Yay!

Now I've got two other gerbils that look like they are heading out, fast.  Four animals in three days?  *shakes fist at universe*  Not funny.  Not funny at all.  Yes, I know these are all old ones.  All due for major organ failure.  But still.  Four in three days?  If this is some kind of sick joke, I'm not laughing.  *shakes fist at universe again*

Big Boss the bushy-tailed jird had an abcess.  Would have required eyedrops and oral antibiotics twice a day, and that might not even have helped.  You gotta understand, BTJs haven't been domesticated very many generations yet.  They're still very wild.  That medication regimine just wasn't gonna happen.  The meds would not have made it into his mouth, I would have spent all my time chasing him and being upset, and all the while he would have been suffering.  Not to mention the multiple bandaids I would have wound up with on my fingers.  Which, honestly, I would have put up with if it had made him better. 

So I made the hard decision.  Okay, I know I wanted to let my rodent population reduce itself ... but I really didn't mean I wanted them to start dying one per day ...

So today, I get to watch one of my gerbils have a heart attack and die on the veterinarian's exam table.  Guh.  That wasn't fun.  And tonight, I see one of my bushy-tailed jirds has a funny lump on the side of his head.  Ack!  Another vet visit in the near future.  I should just hand them over my entire paycheck.

Cats are doing well, though.  Angel may actually be bigger than Clarence now.  The big oafs broke their kitty tree jumping on it.  And they are banned from the bedroom, as Angel chewed a hole in the hubby's oxygen line.  *facepalm*

Speaking of oxygen, I now have my own CPAP machine.  I gave in and went to a sleep specialist.  I have insomnia (no duh really?) and sleep apnea.  I have dubbed my CPAP "The Mighty Sleep Snorkel."  It's uncomfortable, but I'm getting used to it.  And when I wake up I feel like I've really SLEPT!  I'd forgotten what that felt like.  Perhaps this will help my exercise-eating better-weight loss efforts.

On the writing front, co-writer and I are currently doing one last edit of Book 1.  Then we just need to write up a query letter and synopsis, and begin the nail-biting process of submissions.  We're about 2/3 through role-playing Book 2 as well.  And a genuine, published author wants to read our stuff.  Eeeeeeee!

This morning I had to put my 6 year old guinea pig to sleep, due to health problems.  Not fun.  I shall endeavor to remember instead the good times.  The "popcorning" around in her cage as a youthful happy piggy.  The wheeking that always commenced when the refrigerator door was opened.  The piggy kisses on the chin when I took her out for a cuddle.

Sleep well, little girl.  You were the best darn piggy a human could ever hope to look after.

Yeah I know. Been awhile. I've been a LiveJournal loser LOL. Anyway.

A) People who have been tagged must write their answers on their blog and replace any question that they dislike with a new, original question.

B) Tag eight people. Don't refuse to do that. Don't tag who tagged you. I tag:
Urrrr. Well. I'm still fairly new at this livejournal thingy. I'll get back to this.

1. make a list of 5 things you can see without getting up:
Hand lotion, a can of mixed nuts, my coffee cup, my blood sugar test thingy, and my Angel-kitty.

2. how do you style your hair?
It's growing out from a perm, so most days I ponytail it.

3. what are you wearing now?
Stirrup pants. Deal with it. I love 'em. And a t-shirt. And socks. Always socks, cuz my feet get cold.

4. what's your occupation?
Instructional designer. I create training materials for an insurance company, usually web-based training.

5. do you nap a lot?
More lately than usual, due to clogged sinuses and feeling like crap, plus sleep issues.

6. What's your new favorite song?
Not that new now, but "Inside the Fire" by Disturbed.

7. what's your current fandom/obsession/addiction?
Writing.

8. what was the last thing you ate today?
Chicken salad.

9. what was the last text message you received?
Um. I dunno. I just cleared out all my text messages and I don't remember.

10. what websites do you always visit when you go online?
Cute Overload, the LOLcat place, and a few blogs.

11. what was the last thing you bought?
Groceries.

12. what are you listening to right now?
Not a thing.

13. what do you think about before you go to bed at night?
It varies so much, I can't even say.

14. what was the last cd you bought?
The latest Nickelback album.

15. what is your favorite weather, and why?
Cold! And I love rain. Not stormy enough to kick me offline though, that annoys me.

16. if you could play any musical instrument, which one would you play?
I wish I could play piano like I used to, before I developed all the elbow/wrist/thumb issues.

17. how are you?
Meh.

18. what's something you'd like to say to someone right now?
Uhhhhhh. Can I get back to you on that?

19. what's one of your favorite movies?
As of yesterday, The Knowing.

Depression is like a too-heavy blanket.  It settles down subtly, softly at first, then begins to smother the life out of the person.  It weights them down until they can't move, can't think, can't do anything but sit and stare vacantly as life goes on  without them.

Gotta keep moving.  Cleaning, organizing, anything.  Gotta keep the momentum going.  Sit still too long and the blanket starts to settle.  I want to live.

What would I do?  Why, I'd quit my job, take a few writing classes, and embark upon my career as a full-time fiction writer!  :D  (Shhhh don't anybody tell my employer!)

Around Christmas, our vet was selling kitty and doggie toys.  I bought one that is no doubt intended to be a reindeer, but it looks like a moose to me.  Since he's decked out in Christmas colors, he was dubbed "Christmas Moose."

Brother-in-Law was over one night and placed Christmas Moose on top of the kitty scratchy tree.  Apparently this offended Clarence, and necessitated a scramble up the kitty tree to knock Christmas Moose to the ground.  Since then, it's become a regular game.  Put Christmas Moose up there, and Clarence kitty feels honor-bound to GET.  IT.  DOWN.  NOW.  Nothing else placed in that spot gets that reaction.  Perhaps Clarence the Great Warrior Kitty feels that if left there, Christmas Moose would use the height advantage to spy and plot world domination.

And in other news, the vet visit revealed that Miss Kitty ... is a Mister.  Oops.  Ah well, no matter.  Tomorrow he visits the vet again, and will come home slightly less Mister.  The Hubby has dubbed him Angelus.  I told him if the cat develops an evil split personality, it's his fault!  I refused to call him that.  He gets referred to as "Little One," "Angel-kitty," or "Sir Purrsalot" by me.  He and Clarence are getting along well.  Clarence seems to enjoy having someone to pounce on that doesn't yelp and squirt him with Bad Water.

Well, we have another kitty.  Unless or until somebody calls to claim her (we put a "found kitty" ad in the paper).  She was found out in the cold and snow, hungry and on the thin side.  She's SUCH a darling.  She doesn't really have a name yet.  We keep referring to her as "Miss Kitten" (she's younger than Clarence), "Sweetheart" or "Miss Fluffykins."  She has a tendency to climb in my lap and rub her head against my cheek while purring up a storm.  Yeah, she knows who (and how) to butter up ...

Clarence has gone from the fascination stage to the jealous hissing stage.  For now Miss Kitten has her own makeshift litter box, food, and water in the gerbil room, and the door stays shut.  Twice a day we put Clarence in there, much to his indignation, and let her roam around and butter us up.  She was amazed at Miss Meg the Guinea Pig.  There was nose touching.  Miss Meg is used to Clarence, so her attitude was pretty much, "Yeah so, it's another cat.  Where's my carrots?"

There's also been some batting at each others' paws under the closed door, and meowing competitions.  This morning Miss Fluffykins was put into a carrier so she and Clarence could really sniff at each other for awhile.  Mr. It's-My-Home-Dammit didn't hiss once, so progress is being made.

If nobody calls for her within a few weeks, we'll set up a vet appt for shots and spaying.  Oh joy.  My checking account is cringing already.

Here's links to a few pics of her.  Although you'll note my camera lens really needs a cleaning LOL.

http://i197.photobucket.com/albums/aa79/gerbilgal/IM000992.jpg

http://i197.photobucket.com/albums/aa79/gerbilgal/IM000994.jpg

I knew I was sensitive to B vitamins, but I had forgotten.  And didn't realize HOW sensitive.  I cut them out and my insomnia has died down to a more manageable level.  Heh.  I'm still working on cutting out the artificial sweeteners, though, cuz I don't like being addicted to anything.  And they can't be good for a person.

The RPing of Book 2 in the Weather Witch saga is proceeding nicely.  On chapter 5 and having a ball wheeee!

On the kitten front ... Clarence has invented a new game.  He has a couple of plastic rings from milk jugs that he loves to play with.  Lately he manages to scoot them under a closed door, then wail by the door until his trained human comes and retrieves them.  Sigh.

So how does this sugar sensitivity thing work anyway?

Well ... it has to do with brain chemistry.  Serotonin, beta-endorphins, and dopamine, I believe.  I recall something about the sugar sensitive person not producing enough of the right chemicals in the brain.  That's about the best I can do without digging out my book.

In a nutshell, sugar is not a food for someone like me.  It's a drug.  Same for artificial sweeteners.  They act on the same part of the brain as ... heroin, I think it is.  Again, I'd have to look it up, but you get the gist.  Really, it's all about brain chemistry and blood sugar.

The sugar sensitive person becomes obsessed with sweet things.  Feels better once sweets are consumed.  Once the sweets wears off, feels cranky, tired, and depressed.  Then cannot think about anything else but getting more sweets, at any cost.

The key is protein.  It keeps blood sugar balanced.  It cuts down on cravings.  Add in the right vitamins and eating regularly, and at some point I'll be able to kick the sweets.  Then, as long as I STAY off them, I'll be good.  Like an alcoholic, a sugar sensitive person can never have "just a little."

I felt so much better off the sweets.  I'm looking forward to that again.